Ah, the night. That magical time when the world quiets down, the stars twinkle in the sky, and your brain decides it’s the perfect opportunity to replay that time when you confidently walked back into the classroom, not realising you forgot to put your trousers back on after P.E. in year three... Just us? Thought so…
Yes, there you are, snuggled up in bed, ready for a peaceful night’s sleep, when suddenly your mind starts behaving like a toddler after eating 500 blue M&Ms. If you've ever found yourself wide awake at 3 AM, wondering if you really did send that email to your boss, this article is for you. Here are some tips to hush your mind and finally get some shut-eye. Some of these might seem a bit mental… But hey, you’re reading this!
1. embrace the absurd
Your brain loves a good worry-fest, but why not fight fire with fire? When your mind starts spiralling into stress, give it something utterly ridiculous to ponder. Why are there no B batteries? Do fish get thirsty? If you had a pet dinosaur, would it prefer pizza or Indian? And why pizza? By the time your brain tries to wrap itself around these conundrums, you’ll either be fast asleep or developing a theory about the beverage habits of aquatic life. If you’re not sleeping, then at least you have an interesting story to tell at work the next day!
2. the sheep method 2.0
Counting sheep is a classic, but let’s upgrade this age-old technique. Picture each sheep as a character from your favourite TV show. Watch as Sheep Sherlock Holmes tries to deduce the mystery of Sheep Moriarty. Or see Sheep Beyoncé performing a concert. The sheer silliness will distract you from your worries and might even entertain you enough to drift off to sleep with a smile.
3. the sock solution
Worrying is a lot like mismatched socks – annoying, but fixable. Next time you're lying in bed, grab a sock and put it on your hand. Now, have a serious conversation with your sock puppet about your worries. You’ll either feel so ridiculous that you can’t help but laugh, or you’ll get some profound advice from Socky McSockface. Either way, your worries will seem much less daunting after a chat with your fabric friend. If nothing else, it might just put your worries into perspective, and let you see that you clearly need to address your mental health before worrying about your sleeping habits.
4. midnight dance party
Sometimes the only way to stop worrying is to shake it off. Other Taylor Swift lyrics are available… Literally though, shake it off! Get out of bed, put on your favourite song, and have a little dance party. Nothing too wild – we’re not trying to recreate a nightclub here – just a few minutes of joyful, stress-relieving movement. Bonus points if you dance like no one’s watching because, well, they probably aren’t.
5. the power of the pen
If your mind refuses to shut up, put it to work. Keep a notebook by your bed and write down every single worry. Get them all out. Then, add a funny twist to each one. Worried about a presentation? Imagine doing it in a clown costume. Concerned about finances? Picture yourself as a pirate hoarding gold. By the end of your list, your worries will seem more like a comedy sketch than real problems. Do you remember that scene in Harry Potter, where there’s a Boggart in a wardrobe, and it turns into the thing you’re the most afraid of? What was the spell they used to turn it into something hilarious? RIDDIKULUS! Give it a crack! But with pen and paper, not a magic wand.
6. bedtime storytelling
Instead of letting your brain run wild with worries, give it a story to focus on. Make up a bedtime story that’s so engaging, you forget to stress. Maybe it’s about a dragon who opens a bakery, or a superhero whose only power is turning into a brick, once and forever... Useless superpowers are always hilarious to come up with. By the time your story ends, you’ll either be sound asleep or contemplating a new career as a children’s book author.
7. the breath of fresh air
When all else fails, a little deep breathing can do wonders. Inhale deeply, hold for a few seconds, and then exhale slowly. Imagine you’re filling a balloon with all your worries, and then let it go. If that’s too serious for you, pretend you’re a wizard blowing smoke rings. It’s hard to take your worries seriously when you’re channelling your inner Gandalf. If we’ve said it once, we’ve said it a thousand times, other fictional characters from the mind of JRR Tolkien are available.
8. pillow talk
No, not the romantic kind. Have a heart-to-heart with your pillow. Confide in it all your worries and fears. Pillows are great listeners – they never interrupt and are always there for you. Plus, once you’ve told your pillow everything, it’s bound to get bored, and you’ll find it easier to drift off. It’s a sorry state of affairs if even your pillow gets tired of you though… Seriously, have a word with yourself.
9. the imaginary vacation
If your mind insists on staying awake, why not take it on a mini vacation? Close your eyes and imagine yourself in your dream destination. Feel the sand between your toes on a tropical beach, hear the rustling leaves in a lush forest, or taste the gelato in a quaint Italian village. Make the experience as vivid as possible. The more detailed your daydream, the less room there is for worries. Plus, you might just find yourself nodding off, sipping an imaginary coconut drink, while being stuck in moderate to heavy precipitation.
10. animal therapy
No, not the real furry kind (although that would be nice). When worries keep you up, transform them into animals. Is work stress gnawing at you? Picture it as a tiny, harmless mouse. Financial concerns? Maybe they’re a lazy cat lounging in the sun. Visualising your worries as cute, manageable animals can make them seem less intimidating and more like quirky companions. You might end up chuckling at the idea of your biggest fear being a fluffy bunny, making it much easier to relax and drift off to sleep. I told you these are out there… But you’ve read up to this point!
how to stop worrying at night: our conclusion
Worrying at night is like a midnight snack you didn’t ask for, definitely don’t need, and is made of all the foods you don’t like. But with a bit of creativity and a healthy dose of humour, you can hush your mind and finally get the sleep you deserve. So next time your brain starts its nighttime mischief, try out these tips. Who knows? You might even end up looking forward to bedtime just to see what bizarre and funny solutions you come up with next.
Sweet dreams! Until next time, eve sleep.